Doctor visit

So I just went to my checkup with the OB, a five minute appointment that takes 30 mins to accomplish. I just wish I knew why it takes so long to get in...

On the job hunt

Today I applied for a Financial Writer/Research position found in our local paper. I'm excited by the prospect of a career change as I've been disappointed in the corporate world for a very long time. I hope that this little bit of blogging that I've been trying might help in obtaining this position... you never know... maybe I'll be the next Jim Jubak.....

I spent the day yesterday doing laundry. Crazy amounts of laundry. There are certain aspects of housework that I like - not the doing part mind you, but the completion. I love to get into a freshly made bed. I love the way a room looks when it has vacuum lines in the carpet. I love the smell of the bathroom after the cleaner has been used. Of course if I could just get someone else to do all the work to get those things....

Saying goodbye to a friend

Well - we had to drive up to PA this past weekend for the funeral of a friend of the family. As I was sitting in the church I grew up in, I was thinking how much everyone had aged since I was a child. Most of my parents' friends still looked the same, but so much older. The kids that were in my youth group and choir are all grown up with families of their own. I think that certain places and people stay the same in your mind no matter how much time passes. Logically, I know that everyone gets older and their lives completely change, but emotionally, I'm still that same 10 yr old and everyone should be exactly how they were back then. The funny thing is that I never feel like I'm getting older (well, with the exception of the aches and stiffness that I get now - LOL), but yet I don't feel like I did when I was a child either. It's like aging sneaks up on you and you don't realize it has grabbed you until you look back. I was shocked to think that this little hole in the wall breakfast/lunch joint has been in business for at least 13 or 14 years now and I can remember when it opened - seems like just yesterday....

How I got here... the short version

I spent the first half of my life thinking about being high up in the corporate world and how to get there. Then as time went by, the reality of corporations crushed my idealic dreams and I constantly found myself dreaming of the road not taken. I know a few others that waited longer than I did, I began to dream of a family filled with children about the age of 27, but for myself I felt as though I had missed out on something big. So I began my search to settle down and see what I was really missing.

I found the most wonderful man to marry (and yes I was completely lucky on that score). We did all of the things you are "supposed" to do; date for a while, become exclusive, start attending each other's family functions, get engaged, have the "happily ever after" wedding... next comes kids, right? Well, not so fast... apparently even though I come from a long line of fertile women, I was not so lucky. I was diagnosed with PCOS [PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) is a topic for another blog so I won't bore you with the details here] about 6 months after we tied the knot, and that was the beginning of my issues...

Denial, my first phase of every problem. "It doesn't matter" I told myself. The doctors are wrong. I'm a good person and I can still conceive with out medical aid, no matter what they tell me. So I turned my focus back to the corporate world and figured it would sort itself out. I gave my new husband an out "go find someone younger who can give you hundreds of babies". But he opted to stick with me, again giving him the title of "husband of the year" which I know will appear in later blogs as he really is a wonderful man.

Acceptance, the feet dragging, kicking and screaming way I finally give into the issue and try to find a solution. So three years pass and I'm still not closer to my goal and now I can see the biological clock that I've heard so much about. I have nothing against couples that use fertility methods or adopt in their 40's and 50's and shout "more power to ya!" to have the stamina to raise children then, but that was just not for me. At 33, the clock stopped ticking and started pounding in my head. Add to that the years of corporate life that was just never as I envisioned while I was daydreaming on getting out of high school. So now it's time to "do" something.

Solution, feeling like a failure to be unable to fix this myself, I turn to others for help and as usual should have done this long before! I met the most wonderful doctor who also diagnosed me with Thrombophilia, MTHFR and some correctable uterus issues [again, topics for another blog, so skipping ahead...]. After a minor surgery, 2 months pass and I'm finally pregnant. This is the shortened version so it wasn't quite as easy as I make it seem, but I am blessed as I know many women have had it much tougher than I had. I had a fairly easy pregnancy - with the exception of stomach issues in the second and third trimester [ah, blog ideas just keep on coming]. In December of 2007, we were blessed with a beautiful baby girl. Our life was perfect, right? Well, no. If it was I certainly wouldn't have anything to blog about....

So after my maternity leave, I return to the corporate world (again dragging my feet, kicking and screaming....) to find that I have no job left to return to [legal issues refrain me from expanding on this topic]. This puts me on the job hunt and happily enjoying the extra time with our gorgeous baby girl...lo and behold to find out a month later that apparently the doctors did an excellent job and now I'm just as fertile as my family line had been [yeah, who saw that coming???]. So here I am, pregnant with our second, trying to get a job in a slow market and slow state (Welcome to DE!), oh yeah and a questionable termination from my last employer making it SO much easier to find work [yeah, right!!!]!!!

That is how I got here...the short version... I hope this blog provides insite and advice to anyone who might be in a similar situation...or might put a smile on your face [not that I think I'm all that funny, but I sure do try...].